Woman raped by brother targets sibling abuse

"I was brought up as your little sister, you shouldn't have harmed me. You cannot undo the harm you have done."

Jill Harris was sexually abused by her brother John Harris at their family home in Walsall. Both adopted, the offending started in the 1970s when she was a child and lasted years.

On Friday, Ms Harris could tell her abuser of the harm he had caused her, speaking to him directly in the dock at Wolverhampton Crown Court as the 64-year-old was given a 12-year prison sentence.

Ms Harris has waived her legal right to anonymity as a survivor of such crimes, to tell her story to the BBC and raise awareness of the issue of sibling abuse.

Warning: Some people may find details in this article distressing.

John Harris was two and a half years older than his sibling. At points during his campaign she was being abused several times a week, she said, with the offences including rape.

"At that time I'd never heard of sexual abuse. I knew I was having sex and that was wrong so why would I tell anybody about that?"

The abuse only stopped, Ms Harris said, when she went away to university.

Simon Rippon, prosecuting, told Wolverhampton Crown Court on Friday that Harris had "free reign" to rape his sister, essentially "as and when he wanted".

Conditions in the home, Mr Rippon explained, included a father who was largely absent through work and a mother with mental health problems, who was unable to give sufficient care to the children.

By the age of 13, Ms Harris felt like a prostitute, the prosecutor said, and blamed herself for the abuse.

It was more than 10 years later, at the age of 24, that Ms Harris decided to tell people of the abuse inflicted on her. This was partially due to her brother being in a relationship with someone who had a toddler.

She did not anticipate her parents' response.

"Mom said 'if you split the family over this, I'll never forgive you'," Ms Harris said.

"Dad said 'you must have wanted it otherwise you'd have done something to stop it over the years'.

"It felt like another layer of silencing – the image of the family was more important than addressing what happened."

Ms Harris said her parents' reaction was the reason she did not go to the police to report the crimes until they had died.

Another reason she decided to go to the police, Ms Harris said, was that after decades of avoiding her abuser, family funerals meant she would have to see him more and more often.

She said that initially she doubted going to the police and "using public money to get this conviction", but after 15 years of sexual abuse, she thought: "Why should it be allowed to slide by without consequence?"

John Harris, from Wednesfield, was convicted of nine charges, relating to when Ms Harris was 12 years of age and above. He was considered a child in relation to two of the nine.

He was acquitted of eight other counts.

At his sentencing, Judge Richard Grimshaw told him: "You were convicted of raping Jill on numerous occasions when you were between the ages of 15 and 18. She was pre-pubescent when you started raping her."

The judge added his sister had been vulnerable and that he had "robbed her of her sexual innocence".

"You targeted Jill. She was a means to explore and act upon your sexual desires," the judge said.

"She was entitled to feel safe in her own home and her own bedroom … but you took that safety away from her."

He added: "You indicate some minimisation of your offending and seek to lay some blame with Jill."

More than half a century since the abuse started, John Harris is behind bars.

Ms Harris said she was "hugely relieved" that he was convicted of most charges, but felt concerned there were "hidden victims".

Victims of sexual abuse and rape are given lifetime legal anonymity in the UK, but Ms Harris felt compelled to waive this right to tell her story.

"It feels to me like the right to anonymity actually protects the abusers more than us," she told the BBC.

In particular, she wants to raise awareness of the issue of sibling abuse and "break the taboo".

"Nobody talks about sibling abuse and it's a really hidden problem," she said.

Speaking directly to her brother in the court dock, Ms Harris said: "You should not have used our adoptions as a prop for not considering me [as] family.

"I was brought up as your little sister, you shouldn't have harmed me. I was never your girlfriend or a willing participant.

"You need to find the courage and dignity to find responsibility for your actions."

She added: "You cannot undo the harm you have done."

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