Skip to content

Coping with the stress of Christmas as a single parent

Katrina Hughes A picture of a mother with blonde hair beside her daughter. They have their heads tilted in towards each other both smiling. The mother is wearing black glasses and the nine year old is wearing pink glasses. Katrina Hughes
Katrina Hughes tries to do everything she can to make sure her daughter Rosalie enjoys Christmas

Getting ready for Christmas can be a stressful experience at the best of times, but for single parents, there are added pressures that can make the festive period a tricky time of year.

In Northern Ireland, there are nearly 92,000 lone parents with 150,000 children, meaning almost 25% of children live in a single-parent household.

Katrina Hughes, from Cookstown in County Tyrone, told BBC News NI she felt like she needed to cut herself in half to manage all the extra festive errands.

"It's so much stress; I feel like I need to be in 10 places at one time," she said.

She said she felt there was extra added pressure and expectations on her to do everything over the Christmas period, on top of being a full-time working mum.

The mum-of-one compared it to greyhound racing when dogs rush out of the traps at the starting bell.

"That is like my alarm going off every morning; I do not stop from the second I get up until I go to bed at night," she said.

"I feel at breaking point, and it is nearly unmanageable, but I have to make it work; I would not want my child missing out."

Katrina Hughes Katrina and her daughter Rosalie. Both have long blonde hair and are smiling open-mouthed at the camera. Katrina has black-rimmed glasses and Rosalie has brown-rimmed glasses.Katrina Hughes

"I work full time to provide for my daughter, but times are tough to keep up with everything," she said.

"It is not just financial pressure; it is everything. I need to find time to attend school activities, take her to see Santa, Christmas shopping, and fit in time to visit close family."

Ms Hughes said it could lead to her feeling "guilty" as she attempted to make everything perfect for her daughter Rosalie.

"Everyone can only do the best they can for their own child depending on their own personal circumstances," she said.

"I just want to normalise that being this chaotic in the lead up to Christmas is normal for everyone, and it's OK to feel stress in the lead up to Christmas. I feel it every single day."

Gingerbread UK, a charity which represents single-parent families, said it was important for parents to think about themselves over the festive period as well as their children.

"But this should be a chance for you to relax and enjoy yourself too," the charity said

"You won’t be able to please everyone all the time.

"There will probably be times when you need to put your foot down and decide what’s best."

The charity added that many parents' top tip was not to put too much pressure on themselves and do what they feel able.